Mother & Baby Magazine (April Issue)

I submitted an article with pictures of Aeris to the magazines and ask if they would like to feature them. I was surprised that they were accepted pretty quickly. I was crying when I wrote the article, as it reminds me of baby Rino.

This is what I have written:

After 12 years of marriage, I finally became pregnant. However during the 20 weeks scan, we were told that our baby has spinal bifida (a birth defect in which the backbone and spinal canal do not close before birth) 

It was a painful decision, but we knew we had to end the pregnancy as we did not want to compromise our child's quality of life. When the baby kicked and moved inside me, as though she knew about our decision, my heart felt as though it was being tore to pieces. I was induced to deliver - It was a long and painful labour without any rewards as I had no baby to bring home with me that day.

We chose to see her and say our final goodbyes.  Although small our beautiful daughter was perfect in every way with rosy cheeks and nicely formed little fingers and toes. She was gone too soon but she'll never be forgotten. After this experience, I fell into a depression and became reserved, fearful of crowds, and cried whenever i saw babies and pregnant women on the streets. However, my husband and I desperately wanted to try again for a baby as soon as we could. 3 months later, we conceived again but lost my 2nd little angel at 8 weeks. Our dreams shattered and hope was crushed. 

Still, while the mind says "Give Up", Hope whispers "Give it one more try".

So we followed Traditional Chinese Medicine practices. ate well, de-stress, exercise regularly, took folic acid diligently, After 6 months.  I was expecting once more. Although I was excited to be pregnant again, I was very nervous and counted down the days until I passed the 2nd trimester mark. didn't want to tell anyone about our pregnancy, were cautious in everything we did and prayed hard. I recalled waking up many times at night just to check that my baby was moving before I dozed off again. 

I gave birth to Aeris who is now 23 months via Caesarean section at 37 weeks.  My husband was with me in the operating room. 5 mins after the procedure stated, we heard our little one crying. The doctors put her in my arm. I felt magic as our eyes met. I realized then our newborn looked like our first baby girl whom we had lost at 20 weeks. Both my husband and I shed tears of joy, because we had finally became parents. I write this as I want to encourage all women who are trying to conceive, especially those who had suffered miscarriages  not to give up hope.