Mummylicious - Greatest achievement in my motherhood journey

I participated in the mummylicious contest 2015 organized by the Parent World magazine. This year the cutest baby and mummylicious contest organized by the Parent World has returned, I registered for the cutest baby contest and my friend encouraged me to register for the mummylicious contest as well, which I did not want to initially because.. well I participated last year and did not win :p

 

Dress to theme: Evening gown@mummylicious 2014

However, I decided to register since my kids were short-listed for the baby contest so we will be there for the event. Unlike last year where contestants were required to just catwalk and answered to questions, mummies on stage has to perform this year too! I chose to dance Zumba, and luckily Aeris was with me on stage so she gave me the courage to perform in front of so many people. A few has chosen to sing, a few danced and a super-mom did a catwalk carrying her 2 little girls which was awesome! Another mummy who did a hard rock dance was so cool and I really admired her braveness.

Before the announcement for the winner, my husband said I might win the contest, I was told the same when I went around to look at items from a few vendors, but of course I just laughed it off. I even asked to go home before the announcement of the winning because my kids were tired and sleepy, but my husband said we should stay.

Unbelievable! My children must have brought me luck. I was crowned mummylicious and won a 5 days 4 nights cruise on Royal Caribbean for 4.

 

Dress to theme: Flowers/garden. I bought real flowers to sewn onto dress

During the mummylicious contest, I was asked this question. 'What is your greatest achievement in your motherhood journey?'

Actually my answer was simple. I have suffered 2 losses, I wanted to become a mom and be a mom, to be able to take care of my children, to shelter them with love and care, to watch them grow up happy. My work required me to travel but I chose not to when I was expecting Aeris. I chose to breastfeed for as long as I can (I struggled many months but I was glad I persevered and succeeded in breastfeeding Aeris for a year. With Aedan, I did the same and is proud that I am still breastfeeding him now he is at 21 months old!

Despite I was smiling when I was answering the question, my heart was bleeding and aching as this reminded me of my lost child, Rino...

People may said i won because i gave a sob story. Never mind what people says, because one will not understand the pain of losing a child if they have not been through that journey, and I certainly don’t want such thing to happen to anyone because losing a child is a pain far greater than any pain we could possibly endure. It is a pain that cuts so deeply into your very being that you feel as if the breath and life within you is being sucked away with tremendous force and there’s not a thing in the world you can do to stop it. 

To me, I wanted to be a mother so badly and I am given the chance now, I may not be the best mother but i am ready to do whatever I can to keep my kids safe and happy. Looking at my 2 little happy bouncy kids now, I believed this is the greatest achievement in my motherhood journey.

My babies: Aeris and Aedan

My article was selected the Star letter by Mother&Baby magazine

Article was selected as the star letter for the month of May 2015. Aedan was featured in the magazine and I have won a Elle Jetlag watch, worth $299! Perfect for Mother's day!

Article story: blessed case scenario (Submitted by my husband, Charles)

It was a dream come true when my wife was able to conceive after 12 years of marriage, but our joy was short-lived as everything changed by the twentieth week. The detailed scan revealed that the baby had spina bifida, a birth defect. We had to make a critical decision to carry on or to terminate the pregnancy. Not wanting to compromise our baby's quality of life or see her suffer, we made the painful decision to let her go. My wife was induced and delivered a stillborn a week later. Three months after the loss, we were blessed with another child, but our excitement was crushed yet again when the baby's heartbeat stopped at eight weeks. It would have been so easy to fall into a depression, but my wife and I clung on to every glimpse of hope we had.

Six months later, my wife conceived for the third time, Still, having gone through the failed pregnancies, we withheld the news and only shared the joy with our parents. The traumatic experiences before had left us paranoid. It was only when my wife's belly started showing did her colleagues discover that she was pregnant.

This time round, my wife sailed through her pregnany, and our baby girl, Aeris, was born. When she was 9 months old, we started trying for another child. This time, however, many months passed without any good news. A fertility check revealed that our chances of conceiving were slim, so in vitro fertilisation (IVF) was our best bet. Amazingly, though we signed up for IVF, we were blessed with a healthy baby boy before we even started the treatment.

Many people have asked me if the pregnancy was any better this time round. The answer is yes because even though our 2 year old kept my wife busy, she'd still wake up in the middle of the night to check that our baby was moving. By the way, we did not announce the pregnancy to a single soul till our baby boy, Aedan, arrived.

My Prizey :)

My article with Parent World magazine

Thank you Parents World Singapore for publishing my article. I am extremely happy and felt my story was a complete one this time with my son, Aedan. Family photo credited to Ashley Low Photography

Being able to conceive after 12 years of marriage was a dream come true for Cecil Lum, then 34. Out of pure elation, this good news was announced to eveyone she knew.

Although her OSCAR (one-stop Clinic for Assessment of Risk for Fetal Anomalies) test at week 12 to check for the foetus; risk of having Down Syndrome proved negative, everything changed for the worse by the twentieth week. The detailed scan revealed that the baby had spinal bifida, a birth defect involving the backbone and spinal canal. By then, the doctor said the defect was too severe, with no hope for recovery.

Cecil and her husband had to make an executive decision to carry on or to terminate the pregnancy. "Not wanting to compromise the baby's quality of life, see her suffer from receiving treatments and going through surgeries, we made a painful decision to let her go", she said.

She was induced to deliver a stillborn a short week after. Despite it being "a long labour without rewards", Cecil and her husband insisted on saying their final goodbye to Rino, their stillborn.

An undying spirit made her eager to conceive once more. Three months later, Cecil was blessed with another child, but the excitement was yet again crushed when the baby's heartbeat stopped at eight weeks old.

A Stroke of Luck
While it would be completely understandable for anyone who has gone through such trauma to fall into depression, Cecil clung on to every glimpse of hope she had.

"I changed my lifestyle, I exercised, ate well, and took folic acid diligently," Cecil discloses. "I even took up yoga to help me relax, and started on traditional Chinese medicine under a friend's recommendation." Half a year later, she conceived for the third time, this time to her daughter, Aeris.

Having gone through a couple of failed pregnancies before, Cecil withheld the news, only sharing the joy with her husband and parents. It was only when her belly started to show did her colleagues discover her pregnancy, and even then, they were sensitive enough not to probe.

The traumatic experiences before left her paranoid. "Waking up many times at night to check on my baby's movement soon became a routine." recalls Cecil.

This time round, the pregnancy sailed through, with Cecil and her husband emerging triumphant with their firstborn. "I had an elective caesarean section as my placenta was low, but i opted for epidural so that I could be awake to see the birth of my baby." she enthuses. "Aeris looked like our baby girl, whom we had lost at 21 weeks."

An Ongoing Journey

When Aeris turned 9 months old, the couple's desire for a sibling for their firstborn spurred them to try for another child. but this time, many months passed to no avail.

A fertility check revealed that their chances of conceiving were slim and In Vitro Fertilisation (IVF) was their best bet. A roll of events started again with two unsuccessful Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) attempts. The couple went on traditional Chinese medicine and acupuncture, and Cecil took up yoga again. "We signed up for IVF and awaited the start of treatment in July 2013, but we were blessed with a healthy baby boy one month before." says Cecil.

Was the pregnancy any better this time round? Her 2 year old kept her busy then, so yes, it was easier. "But I would still wake up at night to check the movement of my baby, and did not announce my pregnancy to a single soul only till the birth of my baby boy, Aedan."

Although their period of sadness, loss and grief three years ago still haunts them, Cecil and her husband now treasure parenthood an every moment they have together as a family. "Our children have made our love stronger, and a future ever worth living for." Cecil says.

Published Parent World Magazine Jan/Feb 2015 issue